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This is probably one of those overstated
predictions we hear sports announcers make every week about one player or
another, but I’m going there anyway. They truly broke the mold when Joan Rivers
was created and I don’t think we’ll see another female like her again in our
lifetime. Even Joan thought she was unique from an early age on, as evidenced
here.“I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.”
Come on, where else can you find that kind of
self-depreciating humor? She was born in New York where
she attended Brooklyn Ethical Culture School and the Adelphi Academy. Her
family, including her Russian Jewish parents and her sister, Barbara Molinsky,
later moved to Larchmont. Even as a little girl, Joan knew she was special,
as well as svelte.
“I was not an attractive child. When I
didn't use my Girl Scouts uniform as a uniform, I used it as
a tent.”
Joan was a good student
and graduated Phi Beta Kappa from Barnard
College in 1954 with a Bachelor of Arts in English literature and anthropology. Before
entering show business, she worked at various jobs such as a tour guide at Rockefeller Center, a writer/proofreader at an advertising
agency and a fashion consultant. During this period, her agent Tony
Rivers advised her to change her name, so she chose Joan Rivers as her stage name. She was also a noted physical fitness nut – NOT!
“I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to
bend over, he would have put diamonds on the
floor.”
She intuitively knew along the way that she better
be famous and wealthy, because she probably wouldn’t be a good mother/house
wife in the normal cultural sense of the words. She was a good mother - well, most of the time. Um, maybe not...
“My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot
to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a
leash.”
Oh dear, and the housewife part, well, no flipping way.
Thank goodness for her talent and acerbic comedic rants, especially focused
towards politicians and other celebrities. Fortunately she was able to cut the
acidic nature of her outrageous mouth with an alternate line of
self-deprecating humor.
“I hate housework! You make the
beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all
over again.”
“I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.”
And finally, the late, great Joan Rivers commenting
on another sacred institution, marriage, and the timeless love and respect
between a husband and wife. Has it ever been more imperative for anyone to have
had the talent that Joan had? Something had to support her damn shopping habit!
“My husband wanted to be cremated. I told
him I'd scatter his ashes
at Neiman Marcus - that way, I'd visit him every day.”
Look Better, Feel Better, Live
Better
All
kidding aside, Joan Rivers was a gem and brought much joy and laughter to our
world. If you believe the adage that “laughter is the best medicine”, then our darling
Joan was a Master Healer! She had a unique outlook on life and she shared it
with us, like it or not. I’ll never forget her as being one of the only people,
man or women, to render Donald Trump speechless on The Apprentice. And she won it besides. An amazing woman, comedian,
and person, she had one key to success...
“I succeeded by saying what
everyone else was thinking.”
Joan Rivers
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